While disgustedly pondering Tottenham Hotspur’s latest descent into turmoil, I took my mind off things by pondering the best song ever written about football. Of course, being a Spurs fan (it puts years on you, I swear), it had to be the charming novelty song (some would say it’s not so charming, and Arsenal fans would use appropriately colourfully dismissive language) penned by Chas ‘n’ Dave for Spurs’ 1981 FA Cup odyssey.

Now I hear disagreement at the back. New Order’s ‘World in Motion’, the theme for England’s 1990 World Cup, the best song ever? Please. Cheesy synths and a self-help lyric does not a classic make, even if John Barnes gets to rap in it. And there are close-ups of Peter Beardsley.

No, ‘Ossie’s Dream’ is the best. Penned by those cheeky Cockney chappies Chas ‘n’ Dave, the song (as is the wont of all football songs) make unrealistic claims about Tottenham’s superiority, and features the entire squad (with some female totty thrown in for the cameras) singing along to a drunken barrel-house piano.

Here’s the video, with the protagonist, Ossie Ardiles, looking suitably uncomfortable. And, for the record, we need to play 4-4-2, get a top-class striker, and get a bloody defensive midfielder that plays and shouts like Roy Keane. Can you hear me Juande?

Last 5 posts by Dave

• 'New Generation' - Suede, 1994 - January 6th, 2009
• 'Sunflower' - Paul Weller, 1993 - December 18th, 2008
• 'Brilliant Mistake' - Elvis Costello, 1986 - December 16th, 2008
• 'Icky Thump' - The White Stripes, 2007 - December 11th, 2008
• 'Careering' - Public Image Limited, 1979 - December 10th, 2008

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This entry was posted on Thursday, October 2nd, 2008 at 5:00 am and is filed under Other, Pop. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.